In the late 1980s, the egalitarian army retired the baggy olive-green pants and jackets and took on tailored uniforms, complete with stars, flaps and epaulets.

CNN: China's military modernization a cause for concern?

The hour-plus pitch will be followed by a similarly traditional party complete with network stars and open bars.

FORBES: NBC Goes Back To Basics

After he presents their defense -- they must have been innocent bystanders, since there's no such thing as guilty bystanders -- the finale slides into a laundry list, complete with flashback clips, of the abuses the gang has inflicted upon guest stars over the last nine years.

CNN: Review: 'Seinfeld' out with a nice little wave goodbye