Of course if that customer were me, I might have had a heart attack at this point.
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Shortly before his last trip to Cuba for cancer surgery, Chavez tapped Maduro as his replacement "if something were to happen that would incapacitate me" and called for voters to support him.
Nana and Lili often joked that Huong treated me as if I were her boyfriend.
If Facebook WERE the phonebook, that would essentially allow me to be unlisted.
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It seems to me that if these huge companies were competing with each other rather than collaborating these problems would have been elegantly fixed years ago.
It gave me the self belief to go out there and look for the stories that motivated and inspired me even if they were a little obscure.
"For me as a caregiver, it gives me so much support and puts me at ease that if things were to go wrong I would call and they would come at any time, " Ms. Roland says.
That would probably make me feel as if I were the victim of a ludicrous comparison underpinned by a busted rhetorical flush, to be honest.
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The reason why I'm asking that is because it seems to me if those Iraqis really understood that as soon as our mission was accomplished we were going home, instead of throwing bombs at us now and settling out the differences in their country later, they would be waiting until we left.
How would I feel then if people who were totally unconnected with me told me that I couldn't do it, or that they would prosecute whoever helped me?
If you were at all like me, you were thrilled with the opportunity, yet simultaneously nauseous with the realization that failure and disappointment were part of the deal as well.
And again I felt that burst of irritation, as if words were interposing themselves between me and the summer night.
"At the moment it is obvious that if I were the fortunate chosen one, it would fill me with pride and joy, " Eto'o told France Football magazine on Tuesday.
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If you were to ask me to pick the marketing organizations that will deliver the most business value in the next five years, my money is NOT on the marketing teams that are moving fast with furious flexibility.
"If the Burmese were united, that would change everything, " he told me.
Today, female college students ask me if it is true that the streets of Baghdad were once full of women driving, that women could walk around in public at all times of the day without worry, that university campuses were once filled with women who did not wearing headscarves.
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But it bothered me that she was talking to him almost as if I were not standing there beside her.
"From an early age my mother told me that there were so many of us that if I was to get anything in life I would have to get it myself, " says Lee-Chin.
It did not quite occur to me that these older women were watching to see what direction this intimacy might take and that they were ready to turn righteous if the doctor should decide to drop me.
But the one thing that would annoy me, is if peace didn't come and these people were out to walk about.
It has allowed me to maintain my independence that I would undoubtedly have lost if the disease were untreated.
"If we were (going to take over Honda) there would be a clause that would prevent me talking about it, " Branson added.
But it seems obvious to me that neither of these trends is sustainable - and, even if they were, we should not want them to be sustained.
"I recall on one occasion, reading Mike's analysis about one of our policies which we were getting a bit confused and commenting that he had made sense of if all for me!"
And I have lots to say, but the two most important things were that my two nephews from home wanted me to shake your hand if I can, and an elder that works at Safeway -- her name's Erlinda (phonetic) -- she said to make sure and say hi and that she loves you very much.
When I was a prison doctor, not a few prisoners would demand tranquillizers from me, claiming to be so agitated that they would soon kill someone if they were not calmed down.
But I think this is a great time to be president of the U.S., and if I were Barack Obama, I'd be seizing the historic opportunity that has just been handed me.
Also, if you talk about the decisions that were made by guys like you and other guys, prior to me, to be a major advertiser and an exclusive advertiser in the Super Bowl, I think those are the right decisions because brands like Budweiser and Bud light need to be in the fabric of pop culture.
And if you were a Republican, you might say, well, gosh, that looks like a compromise to me in my direction.
Any fool could see, she explained in matter-of-fact tones, that it would be a mistake to proceed with medical treatment if the stars in heaven were aligned against me.
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