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While going through the legal paces, make sure you and your spouse have durable powers of attorney that specify the right to make gifts, should one of you become incapacitated. 8.
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Unfortunately, this doesn't work well if the first spouse to die doesn't have enough of the right kind of assets in his own name to fill the trust.
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If your spouse is otherwise provided for (and agrees to waive his or her right to inherit), maybe you should leave your stash to your kids or even your grandkids instead of your spouse.
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