But your uncle, Professor Quadwrangle, is a scientist who has teleported himself into another dimension.
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It occurs to me that this might be time for a new letter from your uncle in the Allen Building.
The whole family were always a little beside themselves over Rest-and-be-thankful, but your Uncle Enos was the worst of the lot.
Your young cousin apparently spends her entire life taking care of the house and watching TV while your uncle, a police detective, absorbs himself in his work.
If your mother or your uncle is an engineer or a scientist, you are likely to grow up conducting experiments in the basement or launching rockets in the back yard.
Now that I look at this picture, I am reminded that even that 12-string Taylor 855 is owed all to you: when your Uncle Walter died, your siblings got some of the cash but my sister and I split your share.
"It will not limit your ability to borrow your Uncle Willie's hunting rifle or share a gun with your friend at a shooting range, " Schumer said last week in one of the senators' few public remarks about the package the group is seeking.
But for your Uncle Al living in Boca, if he is paying 20% over the value of Treasury bonds at par today to get interest payments of just 1.6%, he is going to get next to nothing in real income after inflation, and he is going to watch the value of his bond plummet once interest rates start rising again, forecast to occur by 2014.
But unless Uncle Sam were your biological uncle, or you had relatives in the U.S., you'd have to fall in line behind thousand of uneducated and untrained laborers who do have relatives here.
Marriage is hard enough without bringing your old Uncle Sam into it, too.
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But there it was, again and again the banana slicer had become a Facebook version of that old knock-knock joke your weird uncle has been telling for years.
Who cares, after all, if your windbag uncle believes he has beaten the market for 10 years running by a wide margins, despite the ridiculousness of such a claim?
"I would suspect that it's because of his position as a sort of an avuncular authority figure, your old Uncle Ted, who's sort of a gruff guy who cares about you, but he doesn't wear his heart on his sleeve about it, " Mitchell said.
Jim, like your father and uncle and generations of Joneses who served before you, you complete this assignment knowing that your country is safer and stronger.
The proceedings seem to keep Grewal and his gavel busy, but at least your legalese loving uncle will have something to drone on about over Thanksgiving dinner.
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The trouble is that stop-losses are too often used as tools for market timing--a game far more likely to enrich your broker and Uncle Sam than you.
The reason is that, when you sign up for a Commuter Account, the money used to pay for those expenses comes right out of your paycheck before Uncle Sam takes his share, so you are not taxed on those dollars.
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With arcades, once you deal in your silent partner, Uncle Sam, you don't have to worry about laundering your money.
Ever scratched your head wondering how much Uncle Sam is taking when gas prices spike?
But you can make Uncle Sam share your pain a little with some smart tax moves, which might turn out to be savvy investment moves, too.
Third, the low turnover of securities in most index funds keeps Uncle Sam away from your hard earned money.
Get married and you and your spouse may pay less to Uncle Sam.
There's a little more to the hack, but it's simple enough that even your non-tech savvy aunt or uncle could do it.
Uncle Sam is listening to your crooked conversations and tracking your crimes.
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