但是伤害我的是那么一种感觉，即我不能有某些感情，我不能得到生活本身最必需的东西，有一种比其他东西更伤人的东西。

I had learned to live with hate. But to feel that there were feelings denied me, that the very breath of life itself was beyond my reach, that more than anything else hurt, wounded me.

youdao

但是伤害我的是那么一种感觉，即我不能有某些感情，我不能得到生活本身最必需的东西，有一种比其他东西更伤人的东西。

I had learned to live with hate. But to feel that there were feelings denied me, that the very breath of life itself was beyond my reach, that more than anything else hurt, wounded me.

youdao